also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
