the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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