i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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