3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize