question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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