He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
