"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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