This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
soo... how was my night?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize