White coat. Heels.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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