Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Come on in and take your pants off
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