you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
