have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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