Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
