Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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