i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
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