I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
