Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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