Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Randomize
