I must be too annoying 4 u.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
