i permit you to call me
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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