I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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