Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
