i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
