Whod you bang
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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