What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
