Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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