i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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