is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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