When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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