He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
