I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
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