what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
