so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
