Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
we're chasing vodka with high fives
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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