Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
