whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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