Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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