Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
