He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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