You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
