Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
