And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
