This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
