He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
