Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
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