There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Duck Duck Cougar?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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