You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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