shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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