my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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