it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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